Rehearsal dinner indecision

I am really torn on what to do for our rehearsal dinner.  At first, I really wanted to have a big barbeque at one of the many park shelters on the lake in Madison.  This way, we could invite everyone on our guest list.  Over 80% of our guests will be traveling, and this would be a great way to see them all when they get in.  Here is some of my inspiration:

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Lovely, right?  I love the checkered table cloths, soul food spread, and casual vibe.  But then, P spoke up.  I blame the movie Rachel Getting Married.

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For those of you who have not seen the movie, one of the best scenes is the rehearsal dinner of Rachel and her future husband.  It is an intimate, close family and friends only affair, and the speeches that everyone gives are so ridiculously moving.  We both absolutely loved that scene, and would love to have an intimate dinner with our close family and friends where everyone could give spontaneous speeches.  (And really, how does that work?  You just encourage them?  But then it's not so spontaneous...)

So now I'm torn.  Big, casual, fun barbeque rehearsal dinner?  Or small, intimate, moving rehearsal dinner?  (I realize, of course, that I am counting on our family and friends to give amazing, touching speeches here.)