My kind of dress

I've never been a poofy dress girl.  Even in high school, when my friends were wearing the popular princess-dresses to prom, I went for a slinky strapless number (much to my mother's chagrin).  So when the time came to start thinking about wedding dresses, I knew that I was not going to be going for the big princess dress look.

Immediately, I was drawn to the idea of a old-hollywood style dress.  I love how these dresses are slinky, yet still classic and beautiful.

Here are some of my favorite silhouettes:

A friend clipped this picture out of a magazine b/c she knew I would love it!  This is Jean Harlow on the set of "Reckless" in 1935.

Another gorgeous Jean Harlow dress *sigh*

Rita Hayworth = stunning

After a little bit of google research, I realized I was looking for a vintage 1930's style bias-cut dress.  Thus began my search of vintage or vintage-inspired dresses.  Little did I know how difficult this would be...

My picture problem

We've secured our amazing photographer for a ridiculous deal, and beautiful pictures are one of the most important wedding elements for us. We know what kind of pictures we want, and our photographer completely understands and shares our vision. So everything should be perfect, right?

Wrong.
You see, I am the opposite of photogenic. I've never liked the way that I look in pictures, and it's made me a bit camera shy.
My problem started in middle school, when I should have gotten braces. Due to family issues, I was not able to, and actually never went to the dentist during my late childhood and teens. Because of this, I was really embarrassed about my teeth. So embarrassed in fact, I did not talk to anyone about this until I was 24 YEARS OLD. I did have my teeth fixed, but after so many years of hiding my smile, it's been difficult to get used to smiling in pictures.

I also show a lot of gum when I smile sometimes (does anyone else have this problem?), which I really hate.  I know this sounds so superficial, and I am actually wincing while writing this, but it is an issue that I am worried about.  On our wedding day, I want to be comfortable, and not worried about how the pictures look.  On the other hand, I don't want a bunch of pictures with my weird looking smile! 

I'm thinking of just being really open and honest with our photographer about this prior to our wedding day.  Any other suggestions?  Please be gentle, this is a sensitive issue for me!

Cermony site catastrophe!

So remember those beautiful Save the Dates I just posted?  Yeah, well, we can't officially order them until NOVEMBER 10th.  Now, I know that puts us within the 6 month mark, which is fine, but it is a bit annoying that we will not have an official date until then.  I've just been operating like we have secured our date, but in reality we have not.
Why?  Our ceremony space.  Here is the beautiful space that is giving us SO MUCH trouble:

Here is the inside, which is equally beautiful and unique:

This beautiful building was built in 1863 and is the fourth oldest surviving synagogue in the country.  It now does not have any religious affilitation, and is owned by the City of Madison Parks Division.  It is really open and airy in the inside, and it seats around 90 people.  Did I mention it is right on the lake? 

The problem is that the City of Madison Parks usually takes reservations for the following year on Oct. 1st. for all of their popular park sites. This was a bit risky for us, but we decided it was worth it.  Our reception spot will work with us if we need to change the date, so I wasn't too worried.  And really if you get there super early on October 1st (and I was bribing one of my best friends with fistfuls of cash to do this for me) you pretty much get your date.

But today is October 23rd, and we still do not have our space reserved.  The City of Madison Parks decided to change their policy, oh, about two days before October 1st.  This year they are going to do a lottery system on November 10th.  Doesn't matter what time you get there, they will be drawing numbers.  

So now we have a back up park location, because it is a little too late to change our date now.  Worst case scenario, two people before us pick both our first choice on our date and our back-up location on our date.  Then we will have to move our wedding to the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend.  Which we will work with.

I know that much worse things can happen, but this has been incredibly frustrating!  Anyone else having crazy things happen with their vendors?

Save the Date choices - Help!

One day, while trolling Etsy and searching for Save the Dates, I stumbled upon these:

Vintage-style Save the Date postcards!  About 90% of our guests will be traveling into Madison, so it is almost like a destination wedding. The postcards will be a great way to invite them to come to Madison, and show them what our (old) beautiful city looks like!  The seller, Beyonddesign, will create custom Save the Date postcards from old vintage postcard images she finds, and then designs to meet your needs.  These were exactly what we've been looking for.    She was amazing to work with, and was great with making changes based on our feedback.  She gave us SO MANY options, but we have narrowed it down to two choices.

Option A

Option B

I love them for such different reasons!  Option A has such a fun, vintage vibe and it really showcases a lot of the different parts of Madison that we love.  Option B shows one of my favorite views of Madison, which you see right when you are driving in, and it shows off one of the lakes.

I just can't decide!  Please help!

ebay find

So we've talked about my obsession with shoes and my eBay problem, right?  It's not exactly a problem, per se, since I manage to score fabulous discounts.  It's just that I may score these fabulous discounts a bit too often. But now let me share what happens when you combine the power of Ebay with the wonders of Etsy.
I was searching for my wedding shoes one day when I stumbled upon these:

What?  Those are Kate Spades? Floor samples? And they are how much?  10 dollars?

Yep, that's right.  10 dollars.  Now clearly, one of the shoes is missing the bow, but this did not worry me.  I knew I would figure something out.  Then I discovered vintage shoe clips on Etsy and found these beauties:

Ooh, hello!  How would you like to be attached to some Kate Spade's?

And that is how I scored/created these beautiful designer shoes with a personal touch

for less than $25!

I think that they will definitely be worn for the rehearsal dinner, and I will just find a dress that works with them!

Have you scored any amazing deals during your wedding planning?

Save the Dates (no acronym please)

A few years ago, I had no idea what Save the Dates were (and no, I will not use that acronym, it just seems WRONG).  Then, all of a sudden, everywhere we went we saw them on the fridge!  Most of the Save the Dates we saw were of the engagement picture magnet/postcard variety, which are lovely, but really not for us.  I really like Save the Dates that are fairly simple and to the point, and P prefers the cheese factor to be close to zero.
Here are some that I really love, seriously considered, and are $2/each or less:

This was the first one I fell in love with.

Source

I love everything this Etsy seller does.

Source

Also an Etsy seller, also amazing.

Source

We decided to go the Etsy route, but we did something a bit different.  It is in the works as we speak and I can't wait to share it!

What unique, affordable Save the Dates did you find in your search?

The best wedding checklist ever

Have you checked out the Offbeat Bride's wedding checklist?  It is truly amazing.  There are checklists on other websites that make me slightly about-to-have-a-wedding-breakdown crazy, but this one keeps me organized and makes me happy.  For instance, there is a "as soon as you know what you're doing" category that is extremely helpful.

Here are some of my favorite, slightly offbeat items on the list:
-tell your partner you love them at least once a day as things get increasingly crazy
-if you're doing an iPod recpetion, work on your playlist.  If not, work on a list of "must-play" (and "must-not play") songs for your DJ or band.  Back up your music and the rest of your hard drive while you're at it.
-Harass guests who haven't RSVP'd for the wedding and rehearsal dinner
-Make extra sure that everyone who's helping you with the wedding gets a special, pointed thank you.
-Procure sedatives for night before wedding.  Give them a trial run.
-Prepare a wedding day frekout kit (aspirin, makeup, safety pins, mints, Cliff bar, etc).
-Set aside special time during the day to step aside and breath for a few seconds. (on the wedding day)
-Take a moment to thankyou family and tell them you love them

The list is full of other, really helpful and insightful tasks as well.  Check it out!

Do you have any other checklists/organizers that you recommend?

Keeping it real

One thing I want to make sure of is that we do not lose ourselves in this whole wedding planning thing.  It's easy to get caught up in it all, and find yourself making decisions that you wouldn't.  For instance, we both knew that we did not want a fancy cake.  We never like them, the cost just seems outrageous to us, etc.  But about a month into wedding planning, we found ourselves getting talked into one.  I know this is small, but I really want this to be, well, a wedding of our own.  
So we are not doing a fancy cake.  We are having my amazing sous-chef friend make cupcakes, because he makes delicious cupcakes.  And because they are amazing, they are throwing it in with our per-person cost (which is highway robbery, and we seriously could not be more grateful). 
There are quite a few things that we are putting our feet down on, which I will write about in a later post.  How are you dealing with keeping your wedding about you and your partner? Please share any advice you have on how to do this!

The perfect ringbearer

I love the idea of having our dog as our ringbearer.  We rescued and raised him together.  (But please don't feel bad for him, he was a puppy who was bottle-fed because his mother was rescued and was too weak to feed him!)  He has about a thousand nicknames (Tobes, Puppers, Toblerone, Tobias, Toby McGuire, Little Man, etc.) and we both love him a little more than we'd like to admit.

I mean come on, look at that face:

He is the cute brown one smiling at the camera, not the black blur of our friend's dog he was playing with.

Unfortunately, we are going to be flying back to Wisconsin for our wedding and we really don't want to fly him with us.  For one, it is pretty expensive and would be a hassle we don't need.  The second reason is we think he may have a little puppy breakdown in the back of the plane since he is way too big to be a fashionable carry-on.  He just gets so nervous, I really don't think he could handle it.
So, I think we may just carry eachother's rings, instead of having a ringbearer.  I like this idea and the significance of it, but I am slightly freaked out that P would forget mine, or I wouldn't know how to carry his (it's not like I could wear it on my finger).
Ideas and advice are welcome!

Elegantly Navigating Family Issues: Semantics

When a bride and a groom from divorced families decide to tie the knot, there are A LOT of issues that come up during wedding planning that I absolutely did not expect.   I think that this is something that a lot of brides and grooms deal with, and need advice on. 

The first small issue that came up was invitation wording.  P's mother has been married to his stepdad (who P is incredibly close with) for years.  P's dad is not remarried, but has been with the same woman for many years, and she happens to be our florist-friendor!  My mother has been remarried for a couple of years to a man I am not very close with, and then we have my father, who is remarried, and who probably won't come.  Add all that to the fact that the groom's family will be paying for a large portion of the costs, we will be paying a portion, and the bride's mother will be paying a portion.  Is your head spinning yet?  Mine hurts.  Here is what I imagine our invitation will look like (in my worst nightmare):

Mrs. and Mr. Bride's mother

and

Mr. and Mrs. Bride's father (who probably won't show up)

invite you to join them in the celebration of love as their daughter,

Bride-whose-head-is-hurting

is united in marriage to

Groom-who-thinks-the-solution-is-to-send-an-evite

son of Mrs. Groom's mom and Stepdad

and Groom's dad and partner (who won't like being at the end of the invite)

Woa.  OK, I know that would never happen but OMG. 

Then I began to search the blogs and saw the perfect wedding invitation wording:

Together with their families

The Bride

and

The Groom

would like you to come party with us! (or something like that)

Ahhhh.  Simplicity.  Perfect.

So what is the lesson we've learned today?  Keep it simple.

Have you had to elegantly navigate any family issues?  How have you handled it?

My own personal Al Roker

The weather in Wisconsin is fickle.  Heck, the weather in the Midwest is fickle.  Growing up in Michigan, I remember wearing shorts one day, and the next day waking up to snow.  It's crazy.  You just can't predict it.  Or can you....

I've found the best tool ever on Weather.com.  All you have to do is create a log-in, provide your wedding date and location, and they give you this:

Typical Weather for May Here are average weather conditions for the month of your wedding:  7-9 days  8-9 days  14-15 days < Previous Month  Next Month >

Typical Weather for May -- Here are average weather conditions for the day of your wedding:

Average High Temp:75°F Record High Temp:92°F (1991) Average Low Temp: 49°F Record Low Temp: 29°F (1984)

Past Weather for May -- Here's a look at past weather in your area for the past three years. Year Weather Hi/Lo (°F) Rain (in.) Details 2009 AM Clouds/PM Sun 72/52 0.05 Hour-by-Hour 2008 Showers 60/42 0.54 Hour-by-Hour 2007 Mostly Cloudy 87/63 0.00 Hour-by-Hour

Isn't that amazing?  Now I just have to hope the weather for our date is sooo 2009 and NOT soooo 2008 (or 2000 and LATE, for you Fergie lovers).

I know I can't predict the weather or control it, but this little tool makes me so happy!  Now I promise not to check it again until April.  Promise.

Making our photography dreams come true (part 3 - the finale!)

The morning of the giveaway, I woke up really early (which was impressive, given that I was working nights at a restaurant and prepping for our move to NOLA) and proceeded to check Kara Layne's blog every 2 minutes. (And yes, I realized that Kara is in Mountain Standard Time, and it was an hour EARLIER there.  But I just couldn't wait!)  Finally, right before I was about to give up and take my poor dog for a walk, I saw this on her blog:



Ummmm, yeah that's us!  WE WON!  Are you kidding me?!?!?! I have NEVER won anything in my life.  And I have entered tons of contests!

All we have to do is pay for her travel and accommodation costs, which really is nothing compared to what she is giving us.  We are both incredibly excited and grateful for her generosity.  So thanks to Kara, we will be able to have amazing pictures like this:

Kara Layne Photography

...and still stay in our budget.  Thank you Kara!

Making our photography dreams come true (part 2)

So less than a week after I sent in our entry, I received an email from Kara Layne!  She loved our story, thought we were a beautiful couple, and wanted us to know we were one of her four finalists!  I literally jumped out of my seat and danced around my room, scaring my poor dog into running and hiding under my roommate's desk.  I checked her blog later that day and found this:

TOP 4 FINALISTS-CONGRATS!
(and underneath)

_______and_________/GETTING MARRIED MAY 29, 2010 in MADISON WISCONSIN
"____and_____ were destined to be together from the start.  Both in similar fields, they met on the bus on the way to their training as Teach For America teachers.  ____proposed at the end of March this year and two months later they both graduated from the same masters program.  They are currently working in New Orleans as part of the educational reform happening there.  Their story and their love are fabulous in every way."

That's about us!  I proceeded to email everyone I knew with the link to the blog, and then had to wait for 2 days until she randomly selected the finalists.

Here is the picture we sent in to Kara:

Please choose us!  PLEASE!

Next up, find out if we won! (I know, I am really drawin' this out, but this is BIG.)

Making our photography dreams come true (part 1)

Remember my obsession with ridiculously beautiful wedding photography that is WAY out of our budget?  Yeah, I remember it too.  I continued my search for affordable photographers in the Wisconsin area, but none of them had the asthetic that I was looking for.  And then I had an idea:

Photography contests!!! 

In all of my blog searching I read about a couple of amazing photography contests.  Unfortunately, by the time I had this idea Feather Love Photography's contest had long since ended, and Chennergy Weddings had already decided on who their "rent weddings" would go to for 2010 (If you don't know about this, check out their site, or read about Mrs. Meatball's (from Weddingbee) experience with them at her wedding.  Simply amazing.)  But have no fear, I began putting the google machine to work and searched high and low for "photography giveaways" and "photography contests".  I found a few contests that were already over, a couple of contests with photographers that were just not my style, and then I found Kara Layne. 

Here is the image I stumbled upon announcing her giveaway:

Kara is a photographer out of Phoenix, AZ who is quickly making a name for herself in the industry.  I love her personality, style, and approach.  She is a photographer who just gets it.  Here are a couple of my favorite images on her blog:

I love the absolute joy she captured here.

I'm a sucker for pictures of toasts.

There was a week left before the giveaway deadline.  I took a deep breath and wrote an incredibly honest email that listed all of the reasons why photography was important to us, why we loved her work, and the many personal reasons why we couldn't afford to pay for amazing photography on our own.  And then I waited.

To be continued...

Bridal Bouquet

When I first began thinking of what my bouquet would look like, I envisioned something all white and very simple. 

A beautifully simple boquet of calla lilies:

But as my vision evolved, I became more and more drawn towards romantic bouquets with soft texture and touches of soft pink and/or green.  Here are some of my favorites:

Credits: Meg Baisden Photography

I am really looking forward to meeting with our florist/friendor over the holidays when we are in Wisconsin.  I am definitely open to her suggestions, but I am going to be armed with inspiration.  Now I just need to begin thinking about the florals for the reception.

Photographers I adore, and cannot even begin to afford

Before P asked me to marry him, I had absolutely no idea how amazing wedding photography could be.  Most wedding pictures I've seen have been pretty standard, posed portrait types of photos.  I've never been a big fan of posed photographs anyway, and this was an area I really was not too interested in.  And then I found the wonderful world of wedding blogs and was introduced to:

Our Labor of Love

Allyson Magda

Feather Love Photography

Photos and photographers like these made me realize how important photography is, especially photography that tells such a beautiful story.  (I swear I cried when I looked at the pictures on Our Labor of Love's site.)

The problem is these photographers, and most photographers like them are WAY out of our budget.  We are talking ten times our budget, people.

But a girl can dream...